My mental narratives have been wild over the past few years.
Before you get too excited, talking about Mental Health makes my heart race, too; I want to be clear that I am not a magician, a doctor, or someone who enjoys being right all the time. I don't have all the answers, but I've been healing for a long time and want to encourage others to do the same. Across social media, I see desperate, lonely people who need encouragement and help in the right direction. Asking for help doesn't mean you're crazy or broken, and therapy is for all humans. All means all, that's all all means. Try saying that five times fast. If you're feeling worse than usual, you've tried to start the healing journey, and can't cope with life, contact your primary care doctor immediately. This isn't a joke. Mental Health is still a taboo topic. The number of friends who have told me that going to therapy means you're insane baffles me, but if you stick with me, we'll heal together and figure out a way to connect with our brains and inner child. If you're wondering what my qualifications are because I'm writing this and wondering the same thing, my name is Alyssa, and in 2020, I was severely wounded and traumatized. It was supposed to break me and destroy everything I loved and held dear, but instead, it allowed me to start my healing journey and discover what Mental Health was all about. It's not a linear journey, which sucks, but it is relatable.
I want to begin by asking—what is the narrative in your mind?
Simply, what is being told to you? What mental narratives feed your reactions, choices, thoughts, and fears? Are they subconscious? If they are, can you bring them to the front of your mind and identify them?
I have severe anxiety. It's gotten better over the years—I love public speaking now, encouraging men and women to take responsibility for their mental health and healing journey, and teaching people practical tools to regulate their minds—but for a while there, I was a shy, unspoken, doormat who couldn't ask for what she wanted because my narrative was telling me I was overbearing and too much for everyone around me. I have an abundance of grace for the unhealed version of Alyssa. She was going through it back in the day, but the only way I knew how to function back then was to listen to my narrative and respond in a fearful, timid way. It's fluctuated over the years, the narrative. I was unstoppable in college, where I got my degree in creative writing and figured out that I love writing, encouraging prose that makes people feel something. My professors encouraged us to reach for the stars and learn the rules of English, so we could break them creatively. I wrote daily like I was running out of time to use my voice, but when I found myself in a dark world, I fell apart, and my childlike narratives took over, and I began to run the show. It took years of feeling pain, processing pain, and recovering from pain to find my voice again.
Now that I have it, I'm never letting it go.
We all have an inner narrative. I'm asking you to figure out yours. Are you telling yourself you're not enough or too broken? Maybe it's telling you that you'll never recover from the trauma and pain. It was too horrible, and you're too weak… I'm living proof that life gets better and healing is possible. My inner narrative used to run my life. It used to convince me that I had too many problems to do something worthwhile. I had to make a choice, a difficult choice, to put my healing and health first and dive deep into the trauma to stop the narrative and reformat it with the truth.
My narrative has had a lot of problems over the years.
I'm okay with that.
I'm learning.
My narrative speaks positive words to me now. I am a writer, an influential writer, and my thoughts and ideas will always have a seat at the table. My healing journey started as survival and flourished into true thriving. We are talented and unique, three-dimensional human beings with emotions, hearts, and experiences that shaped us into the people we are today—but often, we get caught up in the past and allow it to define our future. If we let that narrative run the show, we will never find healing or live a life full of peace.
Challenge your narrative—am I responding from a place of pain or healing?
Process the responses—why did that hurt me so badly? Why did I respond that way?
Recover and Readjust—Rewire your brain to tell the truth: your thoughts, ideas, and choices as an adult are valuable.
You are the only person with the authority to keep you in a pit of darkness. People who hurt you are not responsible. Your parents are not responsible. And social media is not responsible. You have the final say in matters of the mind. If you want help, only you can take the first step. If you want to let go of an old response when you're wounded, only you can release it.
What is your narrative telling you?
And what are you going to do about it?
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